Do you know why sometimes forgiveness can be hard?
It’s very simple – seeing that those who have hurt us never shown any atom of remorse for what they have done to us can trigger unforgiving tendencies in the kindest of the kindest heart! Take that from me.
I have heard all these ‘motivational speakers’ say things like ‘forgiveness can be one sided, you just try and forgive the other person that hurt you and move on, It’s for your good”.
That’s one big fallacy that has ruined many people’s self confidence/esteem.
What if the one who has hurt you is unrepentant and keeps gloating about what he or she did to you each time your path crosses?
You know what that would do to you right? Certainly, it would reopen the already healed wound/hurt.
So what would you do in such a scenario?
Trust me, even if you’re an angel in human form, something will spark outrage in you at that spur of the moment.
And no doubt, such experience would naturally reactivate the unforgiving nature that you’d thought can never dominate your thought pattern.
Some might even, in a fit of rage hit the gloating unrepentant f*ol and a scuffle would ensue, right there.
I have seen several similar cases where long dead frictions were brought back due unrepentant tendencies of the erring party.
Having a forgiving heart is healthy.
However, its wholesomeness lies in the willingness of both parties to ‘squash the beef’, in which the erred party must be willing to admit that he has truly erred and be remorseful, that way the offended party will be willing to let go of the painful and hurtful feelings.
©Dotun Roy